Post-Baby Boom Meets Gen-X

I feel compelled to comment on the current media controversy surrounding Tom Cruise. How can a self-respecting girl of 'The Top Gun' generation allow a moment like this to pass without saying something?

I would like to begin by creating an appropriate 'frame' for my comments. As a small town Canadian girl with limited perspective on teenage angst and the adventurous lifestyle available to my counterparts living a more cosmopolitan 'American' lifestyle, Tom (a.k.a Joel) set my imagination in motion and widened the expanse of possibility in Risky Business. Following this chaotic introduction to a more pampered and risque lifestyle, Phil Collins, 'In the Air Tonight' would set my heart reeling, leaving me breathless at the mere thought of an awe-inspiringly public intimate encounter. Recent exposure to this cult classic leaves me questioning a situation that would ever bring a glaringly pubescent boy and a worldly woman of (ugh) my age together.

If I could have seen past Pony Boy and Soda, I may have noticed Tom's charismatic presence in 'The Outsiders', perhaps the first time his shirtless and strikingly handsome presence crossed my awareness, only to be reinforced in the classic shirtless v-ball competition in Top Gun, clearly the movie of my generation, the only competition arising from another 40-ish superstar, Sean Penn as 'Jeff Spiccoli' in Fast Times at Ridgemont High.

Tom shows his stripes as a Tom Cat in Top Gun, and again wins my heart as the brooding adventure-seeker aptly tagged Maverick. Classic lines like, 'I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you', and 'You can be my wing-man anytime', were overheard throughout the nightscene, spawning a fanatic following, and prompting me to re-enter Maverick's thrilling world over and again until I was delivering dialogue in-synch with the characters. Reintroduced to Top Gun due to my son's infatuation with jet planes, I find myself drawn to the deafening roar of the jets and I still feel my heart open wide as I hear, 'You Take My Breath Away,' amidst a vision of the passionate shadows joining; none other than a union-of-the-hearts to my romantic eye.

There were more, many more. Each time I gained a sense that I glimpsed the soul of this charismatic and charming man. Part of me yearning to be him, another yearning to be with him. Each time I felt his personna couldn't be much different from the adventurous and rakish characters he portrayed.

Within this frame, I see Tom Cruise as someone not unlike the rest of us broaching the midlife crest that 40 is. What is Katie Holmes in his life? Well, how could she be other than the refreshingly sweet Joey Potter? Filled with youth, exuberance and vitality, she is beginning her climb up the mountain of life with great zest. She is facing those 'coming of age' moments; so powerful, so filled with emotion. She provides Tom the chance to experience that time vicariously bringing him one step closer to that magical and magnetic time of years past. In retrospect it is sometimes sweeter, the emotional heddiness remains, but the angst and fear is gone. Although, without the anticipation of new experiences it becomes empty. Is Tom being drawn back to that time I loved so much, those coming of age moments, or to some mature and wise aspect of Katie we don't know? Only he knows for sure.

I only have one thought -- go where you must, but don't lose the Power of 40. Wisdom gained through this life -- whether that life be misspent or relished -- remains. 40 is our second chance, there is still more time, there is still energy; bring that learning together and maximize your life, put into motion all that you want to be. -- That is the Power of 40. Will Tom lose it keeping pace with the younger generation? Only if he forgets who he is...

His Scientology beliefs? I see these as his anchor. They help him remain grounded in the chaotic and publicly driven life he leads. They are rooted in positive life-affirming values -- what is the harm? How can it hurt? He speaks of his beliefs with great integrity and belief. Who are we to judge?

'Nuff said about that.