Read It or Not

The Goal: Live, Love, Laugh and Have Fun!

Just some things on a mom's mind:

I have been looking for something over the past two years, something that has been illusive, that I just can't put my finger on. In the past this has been a casual interest but lately it's become a driving force. Lately I've come to realize that failure to 'figure it out' soon could lead me to miss the boat, or run out of time.

Sometimes I think I'm losing my mind because I find my intuition is my only guide, and I can't produce any concrete proof that what I'm searching for exists. Simply put -- I am looking for my 'life purpose'. The thing in life I will be passionate about, that will engage my mind and feed my soul.

A recent read, James Hillman's The Soul's Code, is that proof. He asserts and argues towards the theory that deep within every individual lies a map which guides their drives, impulses and energy in a certain direction, towards an intended purpose. This theory eases my mind. We are all meant to be something to someone.

He goes on to close all the gaping holes in this theory, one of the most conspicuous being, then, "Why don't we all accomplish great things?" For me, his answer only strengthens the argument; we need to learn to recognize and listen to our inner guide -- our environmental influences can hinder or aid this process, depending on our unique experiences.

Hmmm... food for thought.

Another read I find adding to my view of the world, Dr. Phil's Family First. I have recently found myself drawn to his matter-of-fact view of life, and thought I better check into the book he heavily touts as an answer to most of the ills that pain family life.

Maybe I can figure out how to toilet train 2 year old? Maybe I can end the backtalk and defiance I get from 7 year old when it comes to living up to his responsibilities? Maybe I can move one of my Goals for 2005 forward -- family harmony.

Some gems within - family routines are integral to harmony, realistic and reinforced consequences are essential, generous displays of respect and love are fundamental. A wonderful read, but often too simplistic -- in my opinion. Dr. Phil's approach to family problem-solving is firmly esteeped in behaviour modification theory, change your approach and you change your reality. This definitely has merit and is effective a lot of the time, but is it possible that core issues and driving forces are ignored? Does it produce a lasting result? Like most modern medicine, do the approaches just treat the symptoms?

That being said, I respect Dr. Phil for stepping forward to tackle a major issue in North American society. In general many children are not being raised in a manner that prepares them for general society. The unemployment rate amongst youth is staggeringly higher than the norm. In Alberta -- youth unemployment is 12 to 14 percent, while the overall rate is >5 percent. If the incidence of underemployment were factored in, how high would the numbers be? In my experiences with youth who are caught in this vortex, I have been shocked by the apathy, depression, self-deprecation, and fear I have encountered. I am amazed at their inability to discuss their strengths, recognize their talents and unique gifts -- and most disturbingly, their inappropriate reliance on the iconic images of popular media. We need to start somewhere - the family experience is a key point of influence. I know I want to help my kids avoid that reality, I want them to be focussed, confident and ready to face the world when the time comes, my only hope is that the world they face is a new improved version of the current world.

Until next time.