Peaks and Valleys

After a hectic July filled with competition, family holidays, social events and work deadlines, I've landed back into reality with a big thump!

I am driven to get back to my normal schedule and commitments, I am anxious to develop more opportunities and contacts for the fall, but I am at home with kids. My boys are wonderful but they are a full-time commitment requiring feeding every 1.5 hours, constant exercise and activity, and a referee on guard at all times. I know that I should make the most of my time with the kids, but how do I disengage myself from all of these goals I have? Combined with the normal lull that follows excitement and adventure, my frustration level is so high I feel like crawling out of my skin.

If I could only learn to live in the moment, my frustration would end. Why is that so hard? Frustration is hard enough to face, but once I admit I'm frustrated, I feel guilty. I should be relishing my chances to spend time with my children. I am lucky and I should count my blessings that I can dedicate time to my family. My mind searches for a way to leverage this time to accomplish everything, to no avail. Instead my glum mood sucks all initiative away, filling me with an apathy that turns my limbs to lead weights. Slowly, I am climbing out of this hole. By the time the kids are back to their routines, I'll be ready to go again (I hope).

Onward and upward...